I have been postponing this for the longest time now, so late last year I decided that this year, 2018 would be the year I step out my “couch-potato” mode and really serve God in my capacity as a creative. As you have already gathered; I am a lover of God an expression of His love. I am totally smitten…
A bit about myself perhaps… before we jump into all the exciting stuff
My names are Tidimalo Mokhokho, I go by “Tidi” or 1st Daughter. I am a 27 year old Theology and Ministry student at the Assembly Bible College, Tlokweng Botswana. I was born and partially raised in Jwaneng. I am currently based in Tlokweng- Gaborone. I have three “hunky” brothers, one is older and the other two think they are older than I. My parents are also devoted Christians and raised us in the church. I can not express more how I love God and I am thoroughly devoted to His work.
Why have a decided to start a blog?
I believe God is always waiting and ready to express Himself through us, in all capacities. As a young training pastor, and a novice writer, blogging is such great platform to allow the expression of God to flow out through me. So in this New Season, I believe there is a fresh anointing for His* expression.
I trust you will enjoy reading through my future posts as we learn and grow in the word and mind of God…
This entry started as an attempt to articulate and express a collection of pains and disappointments that I have been through these past years and I can say I can not fully put to words, some of the sharp pains and breathless moments of anguish I have experienced. I have found that the most painful places are those empty corridors of hopes and dreams. The nights where you have to silence the songs your heart sang in those places of hope; Songs written and sang with no intention to stop.
I couldn’t possible sit here and write a religious tale and speak of a mystical healing but honestly speaking healing comes with intention. When you are going through places that really leave you wrecked, the first advice most of our people in the church would advice would be “find your way back to God” “perhaps you need to be in touch more with God”; but the defeat pierces deeper when these hurts, find you in Gods arms and serving with no reservation. I have learnt, that sometimes, even in His* arms a challenge comes. And it is natural for us to drift from Him* in an attempt to gather ourselves, outside of Him, so we come back and serve in our “right state”. This is usually the predicament many face, especially those who have been in the faith for years; Unfortunately this does more damage than good. So like us to want to be God to God, covering our shame and hurts, so as to not disappoint Him.
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”- Matthew 11:28
A majority of us, have been hurt and perhaps some are still hurting. And over the years, the place of hurt becomes so familiar that we sometimes instigate situations, so that they bring us back to our dark corner of hurt and pain. For months, I would bring myself back to the corner, and intentionally bring my heart back to the place of brokenness and defeat until recently.
I am very cautious not to credit people to my healing, because the God I serve is a jealous God. That is why I believe God, was in on it, actually He had been planning it all along. The people around us are the ones who inspire our passions, and become important puzzles to how we perceive the world and even on a smaller scale how we perceive ourselves. God has been gracious to release divine people into my life to help with my healing. Believe me, when you can’t remember the last time you where happy, sometimes it is more comfortable to be sad and depressed; but my people,Gods people have been such a support and I am eternally grateful. I read a post awhile back that said “Be around people who feel like sunshine” and this resonated soo much with me.
The healing won’t be overnight, you going to have to intentionally “come” to your place of healing, and allow God to do what He does best, and that is just be Himself, which is LOVE. And remember, sometimes you won’t get an explanation nor will you get closure but live you must. You might even expect the world and those at your church or even at work to “understand what you going through and be extra sensitive”, Believe me, people rarely attend pity-parties”. So, it is up to you…
Child of a King, if you are hurting I pray that the Lord may come as a rushing wind and heal every place of hurt. Places where forgiveness needs to be happen, forgiveness of yourself or for the next person, I pray for the strength to carry that through. I pray the Good Father may allocate you your “sunshine carriers”, people who will come in and pray for your peace and help you back to yourself. This I pray in Jesus name…
Find Healing; I have through God.
A special shout of love to the one “sunshine carrier” who, despite of their trials has been nothing but gold. Paulo, may God bless your heart and continue to cause His face to shine upon you… You have done more than you know. I bless the Lord for our crossed paths!
I am so tired and embarrassed of having to apologies for my disappearing acts, but I have been through the most these past weeks, I got knocked-down hard but I bless the Lord for His continued unconditional, reckless love.
I am a believer of learning something from everything, and no matter how bad the storm is, I am sure to come out with a hallelujah. Without completely putting myself our there, I would love to share bit on what I took away from my storm.
Friends- The people around you play such an important role on how you feel about yourself, how you feel about a situation you are in and they influence your reactions. Be weary of people who bring bad vibes and burden your spirit. be sure your air is clean and your heart well kept. Although we need sympathy, sometimes it delays you from your testimony.
Leadership- We are such a visual and vocal generation. Sometimes the elderly can not really grasp or understand what God is doing through you for a season. Be weary of those who try and fit-you into abox. Sometimes the box is not all that small, but if the box is not yours, you will surely get frustrated. So learn yourself through the eyes of the Lord, so you can better express and describe your call.
Peace of mind- Find you and your peace. Do not allow any situation or persons to dictate your peace or standing with God. Keep your channel of communication with God clear, do not let it get clustered by anxiety, fear and worry. Trust God and rest.
Time to yourself is so important. Re-grouping and gathering yourself is important.
Psalm 24 has been my rock, a word that has bought such a strength to my soul….
Psalm 24:3-6King James Version (KJV)
3 Who shall ascend into the hill of the Lord? or who shall stand in his holy place?
4 He that hath clean hands, and a pure heart; who hath not lifted up his soul unto vanity, nor sworn deceitfully.
5 He shall receive the blessing from the Lord, and righteousness from the God of his salvation.
6 This is the generation of them that seek him, that seek thy face, O Jacob. Selah.
So sorry for that disappearing stunt I pulled..I know it has been ages since i wrote and I have been mentally writing stuff done and thinking that “Oh yes, this has to go on my blog”..but as it is, all those awesome thoughts and blog moments have been stored in the “spam” section of my brain.
I know this is going to sound so cliche but I have been away trying to figure “myself” out and what is expected of me. I think many-a-time as Christians we go into this limbo where we are essentially on auto-pilot and doing the most of nothing for our Christian walk. Some would argue that into grace, but I have come to learn that we really do need to pay an active role in our Christian walk.
Just this past week I had the pleasure of sitting down for coffee with my pastor and He really bought to light a lot of what was expected from me. Being born into this generation, we can so easily be drifted from our purpose and God given assignments and credit our drifting on things irrelevant to our call. What I really took away from our meet was that; opportunities will come and we will get involved in good things, but those small issues, how ever good they may seem, shouldn’t over-power or cause us to slack on what God has essentially called us to. God is not moved by our good intentions, but rather our willingness to yield to His will for our lives.
The will of God is not easy thing; believe me when I tell you that it soo difficult and sometimes painful to choose God. It doesn’t come easy.
Just last week I was a conversation with a beloved sister of mine and saying to her that the word we hear at church constrains us and demands a response from us. We cant un-hear what we have heard, so we are accountable to the words we have heard. We need to choose God. And in choosing God, I dont mean it abstractly, I mean it on a daily.
The friends we decide to keep, the people we argee to marry, the conversation we engage in, all the somewhat “little” dealings we have need us to clearly choose God. And sometimes ITS HARD…
From my heart,
Keep allowing yourselves to be lead by God. keep choosing God.. And you will reap life!!
Stay in His word, let not your commitment to His word weaver… Lock yourselves in His Word…The reward is great.
But as it is written:
“Eye has not seen, nor ear heard, Nor have entered into the heart of man The things which God has prepared for those who love Him.”- 1 Corinthians 2:9
PS. “Alpha and Omega” is by far my favorite worship song ❤ Hope these worship videos are blessing yall ❤
Still having a pretty hectic month but God is carrying me over all the cluster and chaos.
I have been going through a series of difficult decision making and I have been back and forth and relatively unsettled emotionally, because of these intense decision I am having to make. There is such a great pressure to make the right decisions when making life altering choices. So many factors are in play, and the Christian norm would be to think of yourself least when making such decisions.
That is where the confusion really sets in. If we put everybody first and lead a miserable life, what good would we be to those we have regarded when making those decisions. Of cause, we have been taught to identify ourselves through the sufferings of Christ, that is, to take on certain burdens for the sake of the gospel. But my greatest question, to the wiser, would be, where do we draw the line?
The sufferings of Christ where of a certain season, His purpose was in play from the very beginning but the pinnical of it all was at the cross, where he gave up His life for us.
Though he was God, he did not think of equality with God as something to cling to. – Philippians 2:6
What about those decisions that we ought to submit to but cause a constant inner suffering? Not the type that the Apostle Paul speaks of. But an unsettledness in one’s spirit and soul.
Here is my two cents, I ,of cause speak as one that is young and a novice at life;
God loves us. He cares for our well being and peace. I do not believe God is moved by our good intentions, but rather is moved and provoked by His word. If we are not in any way grieving Him and working against His word then we are to make decisions that put us in rest. Now making such decisions requires an element of maturity and an ability to self introspect to check that indeed what you are about to do is not in conflict with the word of the Lord.
Examine yourselves to see if your faith is genuine. Test yourselves. Surely you know that Jesus Christ is among you; if not, you have failed the test of genuine faith. -2 Corinthians 13:5
I pray and trust that the fellowship of the Holy Spirit will enlighten us even as we make decisions. We can only perform well, if we are well in our souls.
“Our ultimate person as Christians, then, is to allow God’s Love and His Life to flow through us regardless of our circumstances, our own feelings or the other person’s response. That’s all abundant life really is: simply experiencing God’s Life in place of our own” – Nancy Miller
Hey lovies…
Let me just start of by apologizing for posting this late, but February is turning out to be quite a hectic month. Its actually not only February but this last semester that is really hectic. I trust we are all well and the grace and abundant love of God has kept you all.
“for zeal for your house consumes me, and the insults of those who insult you fall on me.” – Psalm 69:9
This past week I have been meditating on this particular verse and what it means to be consumed by the zeal of the house of God. So I read through a couple reports and thoughts regarding our service and standing as Christians. I was particularly drawn by this response that Nancy Miller got from a Messianic Jewish believer;
She wrote,
“The thing that staggers me the most is that the Church doesn’t really know that they must choose to give up every scrap of self-protective, justified hurt, and that we cannot feel anything (negative) for anyone, but Christ’s Love. It seems to me that most of the Church is living “half” a Christian life. I always wondered why Christians were not more noticeable in the world.”
That really hit home for me! I can not possibly be sold out to the house of God and surrender a serve to him if I am still caught up in myself and holding onto justified hurts and other self-focused issues. We are called to a complete death to self, so that we can experience God and in extension those around us experience God through us.
Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship.2 Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.- Romans 12:1-2
I love the portion where it speaks of the renewing of our mind. We could all use a renewal of mind, because it is in our mind where memories are retained. And it is our memory that sub consciously motivates our actions. So what we do, is usually shaped by an experience. That why it is important to read the word of God, cluster our mind with memories of the word of God, that it may be the one motivating our actions.
My prayer is in this generation a remnant may rise who get excited at the word of God, and live it out with such integrity.
I am clearly loving the word of God, and the fullness thereof. There is always a present truth that is waiting to be unpacked and expressed to us.
Cut ties with anyone who pledges their support to your vision on the assumption that they are better, superior, bigger and or greater than you.
This is an introduction to a post by the beautifully inspiring, Pretty Fologang, posted earlier on Facebook and it really got me thinking…
As a young person, growing into my calling as a pastor there are numerous men and women of God who have gone before me and have come to a better understanding of the good, the bad and the ugly in relation to a ministers life. And many a-time, I find myself having to listen to too many sad stories about their past and how this and that happened to them. Now, of cause, we all have our pit-seasons, but it gets wearisome to have to listen in on only the pit-seasons. Now these pit-stories are usually the tight leashes that are used to tie us down in a hope that we wont discover the beauty of the pit-season.
To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:- Ecclesiastes 3:1
To everything there is a season, just as the morning sunrise and evening sun set. It becomes a shame when those who have gone before us insist on maintaining that there is only one season; the dark. Trust you me, I have had a couple dark seasons and perhaps the optimist in me will not allow me to praise those moments. Even while I am down and out, I will be sure to find just that one thing that really keeps me going. It could be a song or more commonly, a scripture that keeps me at it.
I refuse to be held hostage by another persons bad experience!
Yes, we need to learn from one another and allow each other experiences to somewhat shape us out. But my bad experience with a song, shouldn’t cripple you from dancing to that tune. Perhaps, that one song, is the only song you are meant to dance to. So dance honey!
Going back to Pretty, we have taken this idea of having mentors and “daddies” to an extreme where even our destinies are being delayed by a mans own selfish ambitions. Just this Sunday during prayer, I prayed and declared that I would not become a victim to anybodies selfish ambition concerning my life. We all have our seasons, but I refused to be contained by someones idea of who I am and who I am going to become. God is waiting to express Himself through us, if He needed one type of vessel, He could have found the means. But, as it is, we all, in our own unique selves need to be found authentically (in which ever season He deems fit) ready!
That it is why it so important to identify ourselves in Christ.
What does God see when He looks at you? Ask Him those questions, the important questions.
Now lovies,
…you are a chosen people. You are royal priests, a holy nation, God’s very own possession. As a result, you can show others the goodness of God, for he called you out of the darkness into his wonderful light.- 1 Peter 2:9
Fix your eyes on God, the author and the finisher of our faith…
I am naturally an anxious person, it doesn’t take much for me to get anxious, and I hate being anxious.
But this morning as I was praying, I had my eyes shut and pacing back and forth in my room as I spoke to God. I uttered these few words, “God say something to me this morning, what would you have me know. Talk to your daughter daddy” I continued speaking in tongues. ( A prophet I respect once said when in prayer, we ought pray in tongues more than we do words!…But, tongues is topic for another day)
As I continued making prayer, the spirit of the Lord prompted me to open my eyes, of which I did. To my surprise, on the mat that I had been walking, thorns where scattered all over.Mind you, I only have my socks on and I was like ‘ Lord, what is this? ’… God says to me, “Your anxiety is as a result of your lack of focus on ME!”
I had been praying, focused on God; Unaware of all that surrounded me, unbothered, not anxious, because my eyes where fixed. I walked freely, I stepped everywhere, unaware of what was on the floor, my focus was not shifted I was in the presence of God. ( I cannot assume the thorns appeared supernaturally, and I surely will not ridicule the possibility of that occurrence. But from that, God bought something to light…)
I fell to my knees and prayed all the more, as the Lord placed this is my heart. I felt the anxiety melt of my shoulders as I released everything to God.
The power of prayer, huh!
One author once wrote “Where a person starts powerfully shapes where he or she finishes”.
Starting off each day with prayer, inviting God into your day ensures you finish grand.
God has us; in all that we do, He just needs to hear us say “daddy, it’s me your daughter, Speak to me”
Dear 1st Daughters,
“Be careful for nothing: but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God” –Philippians 4:6
Start your day with a focus and surrender to God…He has you!
These are the words uttered by our Lord Jesus Christ as He hung on the cross, doing His “last stretch”. The words, translate “My God, my God, why have you abandoned me?” (Matthews 27:46)
Of-cause Christ knew that God would never forsake Him, but like most of us, pain can blur our vision and even sometimes throw us off character. The very purpose of Christ coming to the earth through a virgin birth was for Him to come and die for our sins, He was on His assignment and He knew very well that it would take all He had to complete it. That was His cup and He drank from it oh-so graciously.
For I know what I have planned for you,’ says the Lord. ‘I have plans to prosper you, not to harm you. I have plans to give you a future filled with hope.- Jeremiah 29:11
Jeremiah 29:11 is our truth. It is what we should hold onto dearly even as we do life, or life does us. The most beautiful liberty one can give themselves is a constant resting on the word of God. Life gets really tough and sometimes, supposedly unbearable things happen to us or our loved ones, but we need to build a culture of resting and trusting in the words of God.
Pain has a mastery of causing us to loose focus and start becoming delusional enough to think God does not have our best interest at heart. When ever I am faced with trying times, I always make sure that even as I sob and do the most water works, I am fueled with a word that can carry me through. Sometimes it is really hard to be all flowery about what you are going through, but I believe that if our spirit has been emerged enough at length in the word of God, when ever we are going through trying times,a word that you have read will come to you and become a pillar for you.
“Be strong. Take courage. Don’t be intimidated. Don’t give them a second thought because God, your God, is striding ahead of you. He’s right there with you. He won’t let you down; he won’t leave you.”- Deuteronomy 31:6 (MSG)
I love this verse; God is not in the business of letting His children down. We ought endure, allow the stretch and learn from the stretching. Because from it, a strength is birthed. There is always something to learn, if not from the situation then about yourself. Its a thing of trusting God to do only what He can do…
So stay fueled up, like the wise virgins in Matthew 25; with the word of God.
I always get question about what I do, and my answer always provokes an endless list of questions… What do you mean you are going to be Pastor, aren’t you like 15? Don’t you want to do something else? Like be an accountant?
Just a few of the questions I get, Some even asked by pastors who are already in the field.
“But don’t begin until you count the cost. For who would begin construction of a building without first calculating the cost to see if there is enough money to finish it” Luke 14:28
I clearly remember the day I sat in my pastors office and told Him about my plans to leave everything I was pursuing and go to Bible College to pursue the call of God over my life. He calmly asked if I had “counted the cost”, and I responded to say “yes Sir”. He blessed me and signed off my admission form. I can honestly say, I did not know what I was getting myself into, two and a half years later I still find myself in-over-my-head.
But that’s the joy of it, knowing you are not in control and its not by your own accord that you live but have completely laid everything in the hands off God. Its not that deep. What I mean is this, We have the word of God to guide us, it is our way in and out of any situation. And PRAYER. Prayer coupled with the word of God is the most life changing thing, it provokes an atmosphere that creation has no choice but to respond. And boy! Has God been faithful. Through rejection and all sorts of trials, He has remained the loving Father I know Him to be.
“I bow before your holy Temple as I worship. I praise your name for your unfailing love and faithfulness; for your promises are backed by all the honor of your name.” -Psalm 138-2
There is fulfillment in knowing that what you are doing exactly what God had intended for your life. This is not only for those who are in full-time ministry; we are actually all ministers full time. Like I said in my last post, God is continually ready to express Himself through us, we just need to avail ourselves. Availing our lives how best we know, according to His word and precepts.
Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.- Romans 12:2
Allowing God to express Himself through us deems a certain responsibility from us; we need to be in a place of having the capacity to “host” God. Imagine being at a wedding and the food is being served on clearly dirty plates. That’s unheard off, there is an expectation that the plates and cutlery be clean and ready for the guests. Likewise, when we are expecting the expression of God in our lives, we need to preserve ourselves a certain way. A life of sacrifice and being set apart is expected from children of God. Such a life can be taxing, but if you allow God to change the way you think and also understand your responsibility as a son in the Kingdom of God, you will do that with a joyful heart.
It is all part of what we are called to be, we have a responsibility… As long as God’s mercy and grace where expended as you woke this morning; a life of worship, service and consecration is expected from you, from us.
“You are the light of the world–like a city on a hilltop that cannot be hidden.” -Matthew 5:14
Be sure to dazzle everyone with that God given light..
1st Daughter Int. 